Congratulations - you have entered the fun time of pregnancy!!!
This trimester will just fly by so be prepared as you will be in the 3rd trimester before you know it!
I. Here are some questions that are common when entering the second trimester...
When will you feel baby move?
This depends on several things including:
- How heavy you were pre-pregnancy
- Where your weight naturally falls (if it is in belly, it will be longer before you feel things)
- Pelvic/Uterine tilt (retroverted takes longer to feel)
- Where the placenta is (if it is in the front and especially if it is also large you won't feel movement as much throughout the entire pregnancy)
- If it is your first pregnancy (you have a thicker uterus with the first)
- What you notice often enough to realize what it is!
I didn't feel anything until 19.5 weeks but some friends felt stuff at 15-16wks. My baby's placenta was large and in the front and even at the end, he wasn't waking me up at night moving though the monitors at the hospital (my multiple trips) indicated he was moving quite a bit. You will probably feel something for sure by 19-21 weeks. Most people say it feels like fluttering but to me, it just felt like gas bubbles moving and the first time I felt something for sure was after the finale of a Christmas concert. That's when I realized it was movement. Just because you can't feel it doesn't mean the baby isn't moving. That little one is having a party in there and flipping/swimming all over the place.
When will other people be able to feel the movements? It will probably be another month from when YOU feel movement before anyone else can feel the movement from the outside and then hubby will only get a shot at feeling baby (he must be very patient at first and wait a long time). Be patient! Everyone will be able to feel your little one from the outside before too long!
When do you show? Totally depends on your body-type and weight.
-Women who are very heavy will take longer to show
-First-time moms also take longer to show because it takes time and pressure to push out the uterus and for the muscles and skin to stretch.
-How you are carrying the baby and how that jives with your pre-pregnancy body-type.
-Torso length and full height: If you have a long torso or are taller than average you will probably show a little later because baby just has more room to expand inside!
When do you find out what it is? Usually at the diagnostic ultrasound performed between 19 and 21wks. Ours wouldn't tell us we were having a boy until the end and it was a little anti-climatic. The technician won't be able to tell you if anything is wrong either but if you ask what things are they will point out the heart and stomach and feet/head/hands. In my experience U/S technicians are not necessarily the friendliest people so count yourself as blessed if yours is very chatty. It is a really neat special time to get your first big ultrasound! You will get pics and maybe or maybe not a DVD of the session. Ask the doctor about it.
II. Next stop: Things to plan to do and getting your finances in order!
-Register for birth classes! At about 18 weeks, it is a good idea to a least think a little about what you want to do for birth classes and go ahead and register. I know a few people who couldn't get into birth classes (even hospital ones) because they got booked up so fast. We actually started our private birth class at 20 weeks and loved learning all the info ahead of time without the stress of the “delivery” looming near (it was a 10wk class). Note that most insurance companies pay at least part if not all of a birth class fee (ours paid $65 regardless of the class) - just call and ask them what your policy says.
We did not take a hospital class but considering that ours was 2x as long as a hospital class and only had 3 couples I KNOW we got a lot more attention and information. The birth class mattered a lot to me because I knew I wanted to really try for an all natural labor and delivery. I also have talked to friends about their hospital birth class experiences and I honestly feel like our birth class was so much more informative and helpful all around for dealing with stages of labor physically and psychologically than the hospital classes. Here are some private birth class possibilities just so you can get a feel for it: I mentioned it before but here are some really interesting website I've found that go into different birth theories and styles: Bradley, Hypnobabies, Waterbirth (Friend in Knoxville swore by this), Lamaze, doulas (My friend Melissa's cousins are these). Note: You can buy home-study versions of these courses for discount on ebay.
Personally, we LOVED the Bradley course because it gave us tons of information, was much longer than typical courses (10wks vs 5wks), had a small class size (5 couples or less), and most importantly, really got the husband involved in the process and us ready to work as a team. It helped Nathan and I both understand birth and it made Nathan feel like he would understand what was going on so he wasn't nervous about it. He loved the birth process and wasn't afraid at all when it all happened. Oh the course was great! You can find teachers in your area from the Bradley link in the previous paragraph. (Again, note that this is more expensive that taking hospital courses but if you are interested in a natural labor and delivery, I highly recommend a specialized class as the hospital classes just aren’t geared towards successful natural births). I also bought a hypnobabies book for myself to learn how to relax better and it did teach me that. I feel like the relaxation techniques were one thing that really made my labor manageable. Last but not least, we had a “sleep CD” my mother in law had gotten us and I used that for relaxation music during my pregnancy and it also helped me during my labor.
-Call the hospital at 18 weeks to find out what other sort of classes (non-birthing) they offer and what the cost/wait is (baby care, baby massage, fathering classes, sibling classes, breastfeeding classes, etc.). It was crazy with our hospital - you have to call at least two months in advance to have a chance to get into some of these classes which are offered once every other month on certain nights - (here, most run $20-$40 per class for two people to attend). You can take CPR courses too. If your hospital doesn't offer these classes, you can always call a bigger hospital and take them there - they don't ask if you are giving birth at their hospital or anything and want to get information out there!! I truly enjoyed some of the non-birth hospital classes and learned/was reminded a lot about babies and what they needed/liked. Also, if you aren't taking the hospital birth classes, you want to sign up to take a tour of the hospital. Find out about the rooming arrangements then too. Again, I had a 2 month wait to get my tour as it is only offered 2x a month on Sundays. While on the phone, get transferred to billing and find out general ranges for births in the area just so you know. Generally an uncomplicated vaginal birth up here runs $4K-$8K while a Caesarean with complications (unplanned) can run up to $32K. Of course you won’t have to pay those numbers as insurance companies get discounts but it is a good thing to know the prices in your area just in case! You can look up your hospital online too and find some of this information. I gave birth at a Womens and Babies (only) hospital and it was just a wonderful place to give birth (I could even use a birthing bath there) and they actually had very good food. If you have an option of giving birth at a specialized hospital, I highly recommend it!!!
-Call your insurance company! Find out how the birth is billed and if there are any guidelines, etc. Questions you want to find out about are how bloodwork/ultrasound billed (is it part of the “global billing” package)? Will you and the baby need to each meet your own deductibles at the hospital? How about the immunization coverage for babies (our immunizations had a $500 limit and we reached that with just the 2mo and 4mo immunizations – we didn’t have to pay 6mo out of pocket though because most pediatricians can give you a list of dates for free immunizations given by the state)? How are well-baby visits billed and is there a copy?
Round Ligament Pain
Yes - it is true - it feels like a growing pain kinda. I was worried when I felt this at first but it is completely normal. Here's a bit to read on round ligament pain. It's usually in hips/near hip flexors, or groin area. Your bones/ligaments are relaxing and uterus is growing putting more pressure on those areas. If it is positional, that's round ligament pain (meaning if you can change positions and find a comfortable position where it doesn't hurt). I always thought it helped to put my feet up and take it easy and they passed. They do go away and then come back and change locations and all in all aren't something to dread or be afraid of. I have heard more of my shorter friends complain of this than my taller friends.
Eating Well/Exercising
This is a GREAT plan for eating well for yourself and baby: Pregnancy Food. If you are finding you are really tired and need to sleep a lot (and assuming your iron/sugar are fine from your 28 week test)...really really consider eating more protein. You should get 80-100mg of protein every day as you near the third trimester. That is 3x what the average woman who is not pregnant eats. I started increasing my protein intake and after a week I felt SOOOO much better and was sleeping my normal amount again without a nap. Remember to take all that milk for calcium too because your prenatals don't contain 100% calcium (you can't absorb that much calcium and iron so they have the iron in the pills at 100%). As far as exercising - walk for 10-20 min a day if you are comfortable doing so – just listen to your body!
*To prepare for childbirth and to help you with any bladder issues you might have in the third trimester, practice Kegeling - try to get up to 200.
*Sit on the floor as much as possible to encourage the baby to face inwards (easy for labor). Sitting in a recliner all the time can encourage the baby to face outwards which means lots of back labor – BOO!!
*Pregnancy squatting is great for labor so practicing now will strengthen those muscles.
*Water water water - if you are having contraction twinges you aren't drinking enough water - if you are swelling you aren't drinking enough water either. Drinking water minimizes swelling. I had a trip to the hospital from some contractions only because I wasn’t hydrated!!! YOU NEED A
Pregnancy Clothing
Places I've found deals at:
- Kohls - look at the 75% off rack near the pregnancy clothes there are usually only one or two - I got a great pair of nice jeans and kakhis my size for $13. Just after the seasonal clothes peak they will put them on sale.
- Old Navy - if there is one near you with a maternity section - you can find great deals just after season (and esp after Christmas). This is a good place for cheap tops esp if you are a small or large person –because at sale-time they will still have your size. Note: if you buy online you can return to any store and get a refund.
- Target - Some really cute reasonably priced stuff - Liz Lange fit me well and there is some very professional stuff there
- Good Will - yes, I got a great easter dress here for $2 just by looking
- Kmart - if you need some tshirts check out Kmart's selection - it is very small - I could not find a maternity section at our Walmart.
- Motherhood Outlet - they have salesracks and if you really dig through them you might find a pair of nice pants for $18. Note: Every piece of clothing in that store has a different clothing size and one large may be a medium in a different style so be prepared to spend time trying on EVERYTHING as they have a rigorous exchange policy.
- Borrow from friends - ah the best way to save money if you have friends who are close to your size. Friends will also have suggestions for where to shop for clothing.
A NOTE ON CLOTHES: Expect to buy a second round of clothing in the third trimester due to season changes and your burgeoning belly - you stop being able to fit into the second trimester clothes!
If you don’t use the coupons you can either give them away to someone you know who does or you can get involved in a “mom” coupon train or you can sell them on ebay or craigslist. So, it is useful to have them!
Diapers:
Pampers: coupons for diapers and other Pampers products, samples, enewsletter **We had the most luck with no leaks with Pampers**
Huggies: coupons for diapers and other Pampers products, samples, enewsletter
Luvs: "offers, updates, and savings"
Formula:
Enfamil: up to $60 in formula checks (coupons) and samples, free diaper bag
Similac: formula checks, free diaper bag
GoodStart: formula checks
Baby Food:
Gerber: Print coupons here, sign up & print childrenswear coupons here. Join Growing Up Gerber here.
Beech Nut: Sign up for special offers newsletter
DelMonte: enewsletter with coupons
Heinz: enewsletter, feeding info, coupons
Earth's Best: printable coupons
I hope all this helps!!! And I'm sure that's enough to digest for right now!! Enjoy this fun exciting stage as you feel the baby move and grow!!! It is soooo amazing!
It seems like the most wonderful fun thing to take a trip to BabiesRUs and register but I will warn you as I was warned - this store is very intimidating and overwhelming for the first time mom! I left bewildered about what to buy and what was safe and what wasn't. There just too much stuff in this store!!!!! So, there is a book has really helped me as I registered. It has a ton of info in it too about just general baby care and common sense suggestions. It's called "Baby Bargains" and be sure to get the most current edition as it is updating every other year. It is not a book necessarily about getting the cheapest thing (it does tell you what to buy on a budget) but also about getting the most safety, best quality, best features for what you are spending. It tells you what is important and what isn't. Some parents really want to look into consumer reports and I did but was very disappointed after reading the Baby Bargains book. Just go to a big bookstore and skim through both for an hour and you’ll see what I mean. The Baby Bargains book includes consumer reports and also takes into consideration parent preferences from parents who have used the items. They actually give a list of the most commonly known manufacters which is great.
Registering online
I did a lot of registering online because I found it less distracting than going to the store but after I registered I did go by the store just to check a few items out too. You get a gift pack if you start your registry at Babies R Us in the store so you might want to do that and then continue online. We registered at Babies R Us and Target. Be wary of Target’s exchange policy. With a gift receipt you can only return for an item from the same department. Target has an awesome online presence though so I went ahead and used them.
Cool baby stuff to check out that is fairly new and very trendy right now and that you might not have heard of:
Robeez - Aww…cute baby shoes and booties that dont come off. Check out Pediped too. You can find Robeez for as cheap as $16 including shipping at endless.com and amazon in January. I’ve also heard you can find them in the
Trumpette - These socks are just adorable - you get a multipack of 6 colors.. EVERY TIME he wore the “Johnny” socks out he got compliments. They have so many kinds now that work for boys including cowboy ones (and of course the girls ones are precious). Beware the size only lasted us 3mo – then we got into Robeez and he outgrew his 0-6mo Robeez at 4mo. I must say though that Sammy has very big feet! I also dried these socks a few times in the dryer and should not have. Note: try to air dry all baby socks because they shrink easily.
Baby Legs - for girls or boys and are so cute and especially are good for crawlers or when momma wants to show off those cloth diapers. I’ve been told that Target carries a limited selection.
SwaddleMe and Miracle Blanket - Swaddling blankets - We swear by our Miracle Blanket!! That's like my most favorite newborn baby thing!!! It made sleeping on his back possible and lovely!!! It is very different from the swaddlme you see at BabiesRUs in that it pins the arms down and can wrap really really tight. This thing is just amazing and it really is impossible to swaddle with normal blankets!! He was sleeping so well when he was itsy bitsy…it’s just when he hit 2-3mo that we started having problems. Another twist on the swaddle idea is baby toes . It’s great if you live in a cold climate and want to be able to use for carrying from the car places and There is also the halo sleep sack swaddle.
Moby Wrap - I LOVE MINE. A variation on the Moby Wrap that is easier to wrap and transport but with lots of positions is The Baby K'Tan or try a Peanut Wrap or Make your Own and here are some sling rings. A friend just did this:
- 6 yards (yes, yards!) Interlock fabric (like a stretchy t-shirt material)
- fabric will probably be about 58" wide
- cut in half lengthwise and taper the ends, so you'll have two strips of fabric that is 18 feet x 29" (approx.) Then taper the edges.
- Go to mobywrap.com for wearing instructions - the "newborn hug hold" is great for tiny ones
Ergo Carrier - These also fascinated me and I thought about getting one on ebay too but they are more pricey.
QuickZip Sheets - seems like a good idea to me!
Cart Covers - just too cute. We went with one and use it a lot.
Cozy Me - It's like the "new bobby" which mom's swear by these days - apparently also makes sitting much more comfy for mom after birth too. I liked my boppy just fine tho!
In Utero - we aren't going to get this because it is expensive but it's amazing that they have something like this and that the baby responds.
Dunstan Baby Language - just a cool thing - can buy on ebay for less.
Sleep System - again - not necessary but interesting thing out there...they have CDs of white noise too - we just used the hair dryer and bathroom fan though!
Nursing Nest - Oh, I wish I had had one of these!!! I really recommend learning how to breastfeed laying down as you won't lose sleep and this will help you feel better that you won't roll on baby!
Sleeping Alternative for Colicky baby
Breathable Crib Bumpers - yes, those adorbable big packs of baby decor, bumper pads...comforter and matching diaper bag and more. The bumper pads are a suffocation hazard and you can't put a comforter on a baby.
Cloth Diapers (Here's a cost analysis on them too and cost effectiveness of them). Cloth diapers are NOT what they used to be. Even if you don't want to do cloth diapers but want to be environmentally friendly for about the same price as disposables, check out gdiapers...you can flush the insert and it is biodegradable. All of these patterns are soooo cute!!!
BumGenius - These are the diapers we use and we like them a lot!!! They grow with baby. You get a 5% off code for signing up for the newsletter. It is sooo easy to cloth diaper and you don't even have to use the toilet with these!!!
Signing - Again, something you could register for - more and more parents are doing this as it encourages early communication skills and minimizes "frustration tempertantrums."
Clothing Extenders - I found this one day on the internet and got me curious.
Pacifiers - These soothies are the only ones my breastfed baby would take at first (all hospitals use them) and then he also started liking the Gerber ones that are "gentleflex". They are lighter weight and stay in the mouth better than soothies.
HandsFree Bottle - I'm curious about this one!
Hooter Hider - I very much like mine! The material is light weight and I even use it for pumping in public or for breastfeeding when extended male family members are around too! (Can get on ebay too).
Black and White cards - wish I had had these awhile back - we just got a black and white book and our baby loves it!! (Called "Black on White")
Mirrors - Babies like them - this might help with tummy time.
Toys - well, ours didn't need toys for awhile but now that he's older, he really does like the Lamaze toys more. Isn't that amazing? Two of his favorites are the Flower Chimes which light up when you touch them and are easily grabbed and his Moose we added the moose to his play gym and he plays with it the most. He also likes the cloth characters in the rainforest mobile - we take them off now and let him play with them. He likes his ball too as it is soooo easy to grip!
Bedside Soothers - This really works and will get our baby back to sleep - it has different lights that dim and light and bubbles and sounds - yup - very interested and sleepy for baby!
Baby Books - been out of the loop for awhile? These will help you know what is age appropriate- you should read to baby from the beginning!!
Always check out ebay for this stuff as there are some great used deals as also on Amazon!
Bath tubs - I got one that was fine for the first 3mo but once he started to arch, he didn't work in the sling part and hated the formed plastic as he'd kick and arch and hit the plastic and cry. So, I got this one to go in our tub and it's a hit! I think I'd still recommend a sling for newborns but again - the formed plastic tub didn't work for ours.
Start to learn about Breastfeeding
This is a great website with info on breastfeeding and you can also go to a LLL meeting in your area for more info on it (can find link to local chapters). They love when pregnant women visit. This is the standard book on breastfeeding that absolutely everyone I've talked to has recommended reading before baby arrives: "The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding".
Oh, and registering for bottles - it's just tough because you don't know what the baby will take and some babies are picky...(best time to intro bottle is at 4-6wks) here are some breast friendly options: Adiri and breastflow. We've used Avent because of the nipple size and it worked pretty well - I liked the ones with liners because you don't have to wash them as much and the liners are really cheap ($5/mo) and we also considered Dr. Brown's bottles since they are so good for eliminating gas. I LOVE LOVE LOVE the podee bottle which is what we switched to when I found them and they are amazing and it is so nice to use to feed in the car and while out! I would suggest just buying ONE of each type of bottle you think the baby might like and then try them out and see what the baby has the easiest time with and the least gas with. So, don't register for those big packs of bottles. Oh, and the kind with bags are SOO great to travel with so you dont' have to bring a ton of bottles to grandmas! The bags are like $5 and last a full month. There's a lot of concern out there about BPA leeching into bottles when you clean them in the dishwasher so you may want to research that - glass bottle and medela-style and bags in bottles don't have problems...it's the completely clear plastic kind (like the Avent) that are up for debate but there isn't enough research on it either way.
If you happen to do formula - We all know breast is best but there are a ton of reasons you might want to supplement with formula. I did everything "right" and still had to supplement my "big eater" with formula. Be aware that you will have to learn what kind of formula your baby tolerates and boy are there a lot of them out there!!!! We had to supplement with formula and learned all about "Similac Sensitive" without the milk lactose, "soy" which is milk free but some babies have issues with, and "alimentum" which is without lactose and is partially hydrolyzed and easily broken down but it doesn't taste good. WE had to use 1/2 breastmilk/ 1/2 formula for a few days before he woudl take to formula and then he didn't like other formulas. Powdered is cheaper but baby will get used to the premixed kind if you use it at first and you can't by "single servings" of that so you have to use a whole can w/in like 48hrs or it goes bad. We also learned all about mylicon drops - they start working great at 4wks, gripe water too helps with digestion, and lots of nasal saline for that constantly stuffy baby nose. Sign up for these clubs and you get free checks for formula ($5 or so) that you can give to friends or use yourself if the need arises - you'll get free formula at the hospital too. Start a new email for the 'baby' to use when you sign up but I haven't had any problems with these websites sending spam.
Quick comments on registry things – keep an eye on craigslist in your area. There are certain products that I see come up in great shape quite often. These include: bouncy seats, swings, strollers, boppys, bumbos, highchairs (depends on this one), safety gates, entertainment centers (pick one with lots of toys) and jumperoos. I have also noticed that a ton come up before Christmas as parents are trying to clear out. You can also find very nice wooden 3 in 1 cribs too. Just consider registering for other things if you KNOW you will pick up some of these items on your own as your baby grows for about 70% off on craigslist. Then, you will get more things that you need.
That being said, be sure that you definitely have a bouncer and boppy - most babies like the bouncy and you can take into the bathroom and leave by the tub while you shower! AS for a swing - if you don't get one from your registry - try to borrow one or try one out in the store (you can try out all baby stuff on display at stores just wash the baby afterwards!) and see if the baby likes a swing - ours kinda liked his - like it was great for 4 weeks then he got over it! Watch on Craigs’ list for a JUMPEROO - I haven't heard of a baby not liking theirs - it is a life saver when you need to do stuff!! The jumperoo is a safe jumper and activity center all in one! We also found an activity center on craigslist in awesome shape that he used too. A Bumbo and tray is nice too - we traveled with ours and it was nice and will let you wait awhile on getting a highchair if you have space or finance issues. I was suprized at how much we used ours through the 4th month! Then he decided he didn’t like it so much. It was great for pictures and such too!
Already mentioned in first trimester email but if you want to find ultrasound centers in your area go to 3D/4D elective ultrasounds for much cheaper than in hospitals (lots of women are opting for this since many insurances only allow 1 ultrasoundand there are many not-too-expensive ones available now! I found a Thursday only deal for a 30min session, DVD of whole session, CD of 60 pics for $145)
I hope all this helps!!! And I'm sure that's enough to digest for right now!! Enjoy this fun exciting stage as you feel the baby move and grow!!! It is soooo amazing!
PS Yes, it is normal for those potty trips to starting increasing in frequency at night especially!!
